A UCTMW Thanksgivakkah by the Numbers.

All that's left of Thanksgiving 2013  are a couple of turkey carcasses and the fond memories of family time together where no one came to blows or crossed that imaginary line of impropriety that becomes family legend.

Whew!

Plus we dodged the bullet for the first time in a few years and did not have to host our family and hangers on. So there is no cluttered kitchen for Slave to clean this morning.  Let's review the numbers:

8000- Someone mentioned at the table that this is the first time in 8000 yrs. that Thanksgiving and Hanukkah coincided. But was there really a Thanksgiving (or a Hanukkah) 8000 years ago?  And does anyone really believe that in 79,000 years, when it happens again, those who we leave this planet to will still be celebrating these events? Will Wal-Mart allow it?

13- People at the table last night at Grandma's house. (She had a cool silver bracelet on about 5 inches long that she must have bought from Wonder Woman. No, she's not your typical Grandma).

9- Pies driven in from Chicago. Yummy.

8- Times Mistress's sister used the word "Colonoscopy". At least when I was in the room. With two MDs and at least one hypocondriac at the table, it seemed we spent a lot of table talk time on medical procedures.

6- Bottles of wine consumed.

3- Dogs circling around, looking for scraps.

2- Dogs dressed  in leopard print hoodies. I mean, it was cold here yesterday. Where's George Zimmerman when you need him?

2- Times Mistress got to cum yesterday. (At least when I was around...one with our morning sex... once before our afternoon pre-pig-out nap, when Slave ministered to her clean shaven folds).

1- Times Slave got to cum. Once is enough for an overeating, pampered house Slave, don't you think?

We hope all of our followers state side had a pleasantly non-disasterous Thanksgiving too!