Yo Ho Ho and a Barrel of Lube

My exploitative experiment in headline composition proved that my cynicism was correct: by titling a post "Scarlett Johansson in Bondage", I drew more than twice as many clicks to that page yesterday as the prior two postings, with bland titles like "Junket" and "Off to DC", had drawn.

 Lesson learned my friends.

The blogosphere is no more sophisticated than the readers of the New York Daily News, as in "Carter to NYC: Drop Dead!"  Sex still sells, and a sexy headline is required even to "sell" a sex blog.

But that still doesn't explain why the post a few weeks back titled "Side Dish" drew nearly three times as many clicks as the posts that bracketed it. Did it somehow get listed on Google with "what to make for  dinner" recipes?

But at least I did have some pictures of Scarlett Johannson in bondage, didn't I? And to further satisfy your prurient interests, here is a video clip showing the scene that I mentioned.  Although if I had been the editor I would have let the camera linger a tad longer on the details of her bondage, or maybe let the villain use an Hitachi to extract information from her rather than the crude threat of letting her fall down that elevator shaft.  I'm dedicating this clip to the other Jay, who is still on his own, with Suzanne and Tammy off on a short vacation. Have fun, big guy, even though National Masturbation month is now over!

Believe me movie buffs, the Avengers does not get any better after this scene, which comes before the title credits begin to roll.

When speaking of masturbation, it's hard not to mention the WC. He's remembered here for a taste for high end lubricant bought by the bucket load. His attempts to load those charges onto his UCTMW expense account have been mentioned here before, But he came to mind when I read this article (likes) in the NY Times yesterday about a guy who "liked" and commented on a facebook ad from Amazon offering a barrel of personal lubricant. His visage then ended up bouncing around facebook in an online ad for said lubricant.  Not the sort of personal endorsement you want all of your facebook friends to see and then pass on to their friends. 

Even sadder, when I searched for  "barrel of lube"  in google images this morning, this poor sap's photo from the Times article also popped up.  Not exactly a  product you want to be forever synonomous with on the internet. So be careful what you "like" out there!

OK.... enough popular culture.  I suppose I owe you some sex on a Saturday morning.

Rest assured that Mistress and Molly had a nice reunion Friday evening here at the UCTMW World HQ after her sleepover at J's loveshack on Thursday night.  WE got back together at around 6 pm, me from the office and she from an office "retreat" up the highway. She beat me home, and when I arrived she was in our bed, already changed into a short black silk nightie, getting herself a little rest.

The weather had gotten cold and damp here, and though we had planned a post-work bike ride it just seemed silly not to crawl into bed with Mistress.  She read the blog as I worshipped those lovely clean shaven folds, wondering if I could the lingering effects of her night with J.  And later, after she had given me permission to fuck her, she recounted some of their exploits from the night before.

"He likes to taste my parts almost as much as you do Slave...."

"I'm sure he's becoming addicted to you, just like I am...."

"I think he may be Slave....."

I was taking it slow and easy, no rush, since we had an evening in front of us with no plans other than a salad and some bad TV.

"And I think you're getting addicted to his cock, Mistress .... you like having two don't you?

"It's not bad, Slave....."

Well, I suspect you know how this goes..... the smutty dialog about her overnight with J drove us into a bit of a frenzy, and soon Slave was begging for permission to cum.  Thankfully, Mistress indulged me.

Just another Friday night in River City.

Scarlett Johannson in Bondage

Mistress and Slave fully exploited our DC hotel room yesterday morning. Our plane did not leave until 2 pm, and though it was a nice day outside, it's not that we'd never been to DC before. There was no need to do touristy things when we had been a little negligent on the sexual front on Wednesday.

So there was some sleeping in, handling a few emails, and an extended session of worship, cock riding and plain old fucking. I think by the time we were done, and I had been successful in my begging for the privilege to come, we had exorcised any latent horniness for at least a few hours.

But on the way home, Mistress did let me know she had some alternative plans for the evening once we got back to River City.

"Slave, I hope you don't mind, but J wants me to sleep over at his house this evening....."

"No problem, Mistress. It has been since Monday afternoon. I suspect he's missing you."

"It seems that way...."

Of course, Mistress is always sensitive that her Slave may get a little lonely on her nights out. But I assured her things would be fine, and made plans to take our cute Co-Ed out to see the Avengers movie, something that I'd been wanting to do.

We got home from the airport by around 5 pm, and Mistress unpacked one bag and packed another for her "sleep-over" at J's love shack.  But she did give me a chance to give her a special kiss good bye.

"Slave, why don't you worship me before I go..... I know you'll miss that in the morning."

She's right, I do miss it this morning.

. But I surely took the opportunity to taste and pleasure her clean shaven folds as she laid back on the bed, making sure she had a couple of orgasms for the road. (Hopefully J did not mind if I took a little of her sexual 'edge' off.... as we all know, Mistress has what appears to be an unlimited capacity to cums at her disposal).

I walked her down to the car, and loaded her bag for her, like a good Slave.

"You know I should be making you wear your cage slave....."

"If you wish, Mistress....."

"But that would be a little mean, wouldn't it.  Just no touching!"

I agreed to those generous terms and she was off.

And soon I was off to the movies with our daughter. Which is where the headline comes in (I know, it's a tease, but its a little experiment I'm conducting.... I note that the tone of the headline definitely impacts the number of 'clicks" this page gets.... though I still can't explain why the bog titled "Side Dish" a few weeks back went off the charts).

The Avengers was typical over special effected super hero movie action, with a few clever lines, some overstuffed villian ranting,  and very little else in it. Except for the part at the very beginning which featured Scarlett Johannson (who I have had a "soft" spot for since her first movie with Bill Murray), in sexy undies, black tights and ropes.  Yum. She's tied to a chair, though it's not sexy bondage, but "tell me what I want to know or I'll tip the chair down the elevator shaft" bondage.  Suffice it to say, the "Black Widow" escapes from her plight with panache. Sadly, all this happens before the title credits, and she does not reprise the role of damsel in distress for the rest of the flick. Though she does a nice job of filling out a leather cat suit.

But It is funny what you come up with when you google "Scarlett Johannson in bondage".

Is one of those women really her?  Which one?

You will be happy to know that despite this source of stimulation, Slave followed the "no touch" regime last night. And Mistress did check in with me before she and J went to sleep last night, reminding me that she loved me and was thinking of me.

I was thinking about you too, Mistress.  And love you too!