On the Road Again

Mistress and Slave are heading west today for a week at our SW hideaway. There's some talk that the WC may come down to visit. He certainly has some 'splaining to about the outrageous bills he's run up on his reportorial expedition to Sochi. I mean, how can you pay $31,250.85 for room service  at a hotel in some podunk town in Russia, when you are also running up charges of $12,684.50 for restaurant meals? (At least service was included.) And should it really cost $4625.42 to rent a fucking  1988 Lada with standard transmission for a week? I thought they had some fancy new public transportation system that Putin built just for the games. Somehow I think the WC will want to have this discussion via Skype.

Fortunately, Mistress and Slave are heading to New Mexico, where according to a recent study, folks take more time having sex than in any other state in our "union". Here is the link:Which states have the longest and shortest sex. According to this study, which may be the product of questionable methodology,  when in New Mexico couples take on average 7:01 minutes to have sex. But here in our so called home state, we only take 2:18 minutes per sexual intercourse.

Here is a chart which gives you a sense of where folks  take their time vs. where it's "slam bang, pass my laptop over honey."

Now I know you're probably  asking --- what are they counting? When I heard numbers in the two minute range, I said to myself "heck, you've barely started the oral worship phase of love making in that amount of time, Slave." But apparently they are not counting foreplay. These times only include the time from urgent insertion to withdrawal in a heap of sweaty exhaustion. But even so, Slave is at an age where the "quick release" is a thing of the past. I guess that's why no one has asked me to suit up as the Pussycats QB?

It does not surprise me that New Mexicans take more time than anywhere else. Life is at a slower pace there for us, and seemingly for most of the folks with whom we interact. Where else do you hear a radio ad for a fence company where the tag line on the ad is "we actually show up when we say we will." So if you take a little extra time in the sack before heading to the office, who's gonna notice?

But what's a little troubling is that West Virginia is second on the list. I associate that state more with black lung and cross breeding. Is reduced lung capacity another explanation for a guy taking longer to get there?

Maybe some of our readers have a theory on why their states place poorly on this chart. Suzanne, I notice that in Massachusetts you get it over with quicker than in New Hampshire and Connecticut. Does that have something to do with Tom Brady or the Red Sox?

In any event, we are looking forward to some slow developing cums in the next week or so.... but wherever you are, just stick the stop watch in the bedside table and enjoy yourselves.