Looking For Love In All the Wrong Places

Mistress and slave have been spending lots of time in bed and on the ski slopes this week.  We even had a couple of “two-a-days”, enabled by a a late afternoon nap that revived both of our energy levels after several hours out in the cold and on our legs. 

Another aid is slave’s faithful “aneros”.

Why not put in your device, slave?”

As phrased, it was a question.  But I considered it an order from a Mistress who doesn’t want to bother with anything other than a firm and steady work-a-day cock if she is going to indulge in some later afternoon nookie.  And she got exactly what she was looking for.  

(BTW, we do not display my aneros on the book shelf as a knick knack....But it sure would be a conversation starter, wouldn't it?)

Sadly, Mistress has been left with only her slave’s attentions these last few weeks. And it seems she may have to “suffer” a little longer, at least until we get back to River City in the next few days.  We clearly struck out with AM here in the high desert, and a study by some grad students at the University of Toledo may explain why.  It seems that male AM users are more likely to me concentrated in affluent areas outside of big cities rather than out here on the edge of the wilderness.  The researchers (who specialize in geography and planning) used data found in the big AM leak of a couple of years ago to probe into the locus of all those male philanderers:

The result was a first-of-its-kind geographical look at internet-facilitated infidelity, and serves as a warning to the wives of affluent Fairfield County, Connecticut, home to tony Greenwich and Stamford.

That area posted the highest rate of male subscribers who paid the website to engage in extramarital affairs.

Researchers found the Fairfield area led the nation with 6.23 Ashley Madison subscriptions per 1,000 people aged 18 to 79, followed by the metropolitan areas of Boulder, Colo., Jacksonville, N.C., and Manchester, N.H.

The metro Toledo area was in the “middle of the pack,” with “nothing unusual going on,” said Mr. Chohaney.

In fact, it turns out that River City has a higher percentage of AM users than “Greater Toledo” (which sounds like an oxymoron, doesn’t it?).

There wasn’t a link to let me drill down into AM users in the SW, but since this is a relatively  less affluent area, it explains the slim pickings for a Mistress with “permission” to acquire a side-dish. The study also explains why she kept getting solicitations from the Boulder / Denver suburbs, even though that area is too many hours away to find a reliable extracurricular lover.

 

Maybe we need to look on that “FarmersOnly.com” site the next time? I love their slogan “City Folk Just Don’t Get It”. 

Mistress might just take a cotton to a guy who knows his way around livestock. 

Scraping the Bottom of the Ashley Madison Barrell

We are back in River City, grateful our drive through the (very) Smokies was a day before all hell broke loose. We have gotten back into our daily sexual rhythms, with wake up sex and evening worship.  It's a good life!

But on the cuckolding front, Mistress is about ready to give up on AM as the way to identify a back-up sidedish.  Maybe it was the whole security issue that has limited the choices available.  Or maybe Mistress has just become more discerning (or more cynical?) about the guys who turn to AM in an effort to "find the passion lost" in their marriages, relationships, or life. After all Mistress just wants someone to have a little extracurricular fun with.... she doesn't want to be a therapist.


As her designated corresponding secretary, it's been my job to act as the filter on her AM account. I try to show her only the missives or photo requests that could possibly draw her attention, or at least get a good laugh. That means in excess of 90% of the potential applicants end up "trashed".  The grounds for rejection are multiple and varied: too short (should be at least as tall as me, 5'11"); too large; too old (Mistress already has one mate in his 60's) ; too young (no 20 or 30 somethings); too whiny about his sexless marriage; too far away ( rejected if you come from more than 50 miles away); too likely to be a pussy grabbing white supremacist Trump voter.

After Mistress takes a look at the profiles or photos of the remainder, another 90% of the remainders get rejected.  She is picky, as she should be.  There is one more "date" set up for drinks after work tonight with a single guy recently moved here. After that.... well maybe Mistress's profile goes dark once again, at least through the holidays.

The only downside will be missing the applicants who generate some blog fodder. Like the late 50's guy from KY who recently tried a contrarian approach to get Mistress's attention....the "you're too old for me".  Here is his message:

Good morning!  Although your profile sounds very interesting I am finding that women over 42 years of age cannot keep up with me I'm not saying we could not have a good time Just that usually older women have a little less stamina and  with my conditioning I do have a lot of endurance and stamina if you know what I mean :-)  if you check me out and you're interested let's at least chat your town is a very easy drive for me if you're available in the afternoons ?  Who knows we might become best friends both in and out of the bedroom ! 

To summarize, this guy's come on is "even though I'm older than you, you're probably too old for me"!  You can imagine how that went over with Mistress.  And she didn't revise her opinion when she caught a glimpse of the selfies this scrawny old fart sent with his message.  Here's an example:

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Is that a scar, or a centipede crawling up his "6 pack"?

I guess one thing I will miss if we go dark on AM is the blog fodder it generates!

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Back to the Drawing Board....

Here in River City, Mistress and slave have been slowly adjusting to the 6 hr. time shift and the notion that our nation will soon be under the thumb of a narcissistic blowhard with an itchy trigger finer and a penchant for locking up folks he disagrees with.

So at least one distraction has been dabbling in the quest for a new (or additional) side-dish to amuse Mistress and cuckold her slave.  There was a prospect- an outdoorsy type about Mistress's age who lives up the road a bit.  We had exchanged emails while we were overseas, and Mistress set up a lunch "date" with him yesterday.  But the report was not so good....

"He's nice enough slave....but a little dorkier than I would have expected...."

"Any spark?" (i.e. that de rigeur spark of attraction that must accompany any suitable side-dish).

"Not really slave....he clearly liked me... said I looked hotter than my pictures....but I must say there was no spark on my side of the table for him...."

"How did you leave it with him?"

"Told him that I'd have to 'think about it'".

Not what one wants to hear from the Ashley Madision hotty he's been courting, is it?

Ah well.....  there were a few "Plan B" suitors we may need to consider.  Then there was some 37 yr. old who got in touch via our "Slave on the Lam" twitter account... He asked if we wanted to "hang out" some time, and aspires to be a cuckolder. I politely responded to him that we were probably too old for him....But he was non-plused:

"Age is a number to me. I love older folks".

Why does that sound like he enjoys visiting the elderly at his local nursing home to sing Christmas carols?

In the meantime, Jay has made up with his Trump voting Mom and apparently has arranged for child care on Sunday evening.

"He asked if he could come over for dinner Sunday evening. Sounds like he wants to stay over...."

I guess slave has some menu planning to do.

Bad Hombres

Here in River City, in the heart of "swing state" country, Mistress and slave are counting the minutes until this long and ugly political campaign finally ends. So desperate are we to tune it out that we plan to leave the country for the last 10 days of the campaign. At least we can get in the front of the Q for political asylum if things go badly, right?

But of course, we couldn't look away from last night's train wreck of a final debate. And snickered when Mr. Trump warned of all those "bad hombres" he was going to track down and deport.  Was he talking about these guys.

Of course, Mistress has had a few "bad boy" suitors on AM who purport to be "doms", but they tend to melt away when Mistress declines to engage in on-line smut talk before any face to face encounter.

"I think some of these guys are just into the cyber-thrill slave...all talk and no spanking!"

SAdly, the Donald's slur of immigrants from south of the border was quintessentially sexist. Slave would be more interested in hearing about all those Mal Chicas free ranging here until he builds that big assed wall. Like this one on the left.

 Finally, without wanting to get anyone's hopes up, there is a rumor that Mistress's long lost lover Jay will be coming by tonight. Should he actually materialize, there are plans for dinner out (the three of us) and a sleepover after, with slave consigned to one of our daughter's rooms. But lets not get our hopes up.

Is There a Bot For This?

Back in River City, Mistress and slave are settling into a few weeks of the grind before a trip in late October to visit our daughter who is across the pond working on a  Masters degree.

And while Jay remains vaguely in the picture, hampered by child care issues, and yet a little snippy about Mistress’s travel schedule, we are still sorting through a variety of AM applicants.

Slave is in charge of deleting most of the “attached” suitors, who seem to try a little too hard to explain why they need succor from their sterile marriages.

Isn’t that their problem? 

But there are a few single guys, or those who claim they have permission, that have surfaced, so we are now in the vetting process.  But it all is a bit of a hassle for a Mistress who has work to do. Thankfully she has her “corresponding secretary” to help her sort wheat from chaff. But it still puts a burden on Mistress to do the final screening, presumably over drinks or dinner, or by phone call interviews.

Which brings up the alternative: in this world of artificial intelligence, isn’t it a shame that there is not a faux male sex robot to provide Mistress with some sexual attention?  Yesterday the Washington Post had an article titled "Don't Worry about Sex Robots.  They Won’t Ruin Sex”. Here is the  link. The discussion is about some recent popular media depictions of sex robots as a replacement for personal attention (like the HBO series Westworld) and the feminist backlash:

Anti-sexbot sentiment is so intense that it has even prompted a feminist grass-roots collective, the Campaign Against Sex Robots. In its mission statement, the organization equates the relationship between a sex robot and its owner to that of a john and a non-consenting prostitute, breathlessly warning that sex robots will “reduce human empathy,” “reinforce power relations of inequality and violence” and “sexually [objectify] women and children.”

I suspect that all of this  feminist outrage may be triggered by the fear that men will rely on sex-robots to the detriment of women in an already competitive sexual marketplace.

But with a little imagination, and a lot of technology, couldn’t all those geeks in Silicon Valley come up with a pleasing male like android who could do just as good a job pleasing a Mistress with high standards as the lady bots in WestWorld purportedly do for the male guests?

 

Certainly there would be no problem in engineering a special occasion cock that never has performance issues. Or, even better, would not get all chafed and irritated of sealed away in a cock cage between uses.

And with such technology available, Mistress would never have to worry about a sidedish with child care issues, or wasting a cocktail hour on some guy who turns out to be  much dud-ier than his pithy AM messages would otherwise suggest.

Maybe it's time for GE to bring good cocks to life.

Down By the River

Mistress and Slave got their achy bodies moving again yesterday afternoon with a walk down into the nearby Rio Grande gorge for some "beach time".  There are some natural hot springs at the base of a 1/2 mile trail that winds into the deep, rocky gorge that was the location of a stage coach crossing back in the 1800's. The remnants of an old "spa" form the base for some warm rustic pools on the banks of the River frequented by locals, who always seem to have a couple of dogs with them.  (the pic shows the springs from the trail above.
Mistress and Slave stripped down to their bathing costumes and waded into the cold, soothing river after the hot trek down the old stage coach "road". But when we relaxed on the "beach" with our lunch and our books, the "crowds" (and their dogs) started to arrive. As Mistress tried to relax she was treated on more than one occasion to a large mutt standing just next to her lush body and shaking off the water acquired during a wade through the river.

"Ewwww", was the only appropriate response. For whatever reasons, the dogs were much more interested in shedding their watery weight on Mistress rather than her devoted Slave.  Bummer.

But Slave had his own set of distractions. Two young hippie chicks had arrived (with their two dogs) who quickly relieved themselves of their clothes for all the world (0r at least those of us sharing this tiny beach) to see. This was in the tradition of that scene from Easy Rider, filmed at these springs back in the early 70's, when Dennis Hopper and Peter Fonda "swam" in the nude with two hippie chicks from a local commune.

Slave tried not to ogle as one lady shed her trail clothes and switched into a skimpy bikini.   The other girl just stripped down to some black undies. Other than her very white boobs, the rest of her body seemed to be completely covered by tatoos.  Slave must have "accidentally" captured her image digitally while taking a photo of the river, as she lounged on the luke warm pool with her companion, while her dogs annoyed Mistress

But of course it's not just the ladies who can strut their stuff on (or in) local waterways. Our trip to the river reminded me of one of Mistress AM recent supplicants, someone from not too far away from here, who's "private showcase" demonstrated  a unique approach to fly fishing:

Apparently this guy has a unique "lure" that he thinks will enhance his chance of landing some tasty cut throat trout. The trouble was that the photo is dated as taken in 2002.  He's actually trying to "land" chicks on AM with a 12 year old shot of his ass.

As you might expect, Mistress was not interested in taking the moldy bait.