So the folks at ALL Mine don't have to worry about the delicate task of deciding which of our offers to accept, or come up with terms even more salacious as an alternative.
Mistress does not follow football with much interest. But as we sat with some friends watching the 2nd half yesterday, she seemed unusually curious about the outcome. Whatever smutty fantasies she was having about a possible close encounter with Jay's TC were receding before her, sort of like the American Dream at the end of the "Great Gatsby". Ah, well, Mistress..... there's always next year.
And the bad news for Suzanne, Jay and Tammy is that the Patriots may now have a far more formidable opponent to face next Saturday night.... Though I suppose there is a slight possibility that our Western Correspondent's favorite team, (AKA Jesus's Team) may face the lads from New England at some point in these playoffs. Maybe we can somehow involve him in a wager with Suzanne? If so I suggest that Big Blackie play a prominent role.
In focusing on yesterday's potential Wager, I skipped over a rather bizarre incident here on Friday morning. Mistress had an early morning, 7:30 am breakfast meeting at a little restaurant just a few blocks away in our antiseptic little community. She was typically costumed for work - black dress, those special black tights, and black boots too. I kissed her goodbye, with plans to pick her up in an hour for our commute to work.
But barely 5 minutes later, as I was frying some eggs for a little breakfast of my own, the phone rang:
"Slave.... you need to come down here now.... I've been detained by the Police..... for jaywalking...."
Arggh. I knew I shouldn't have given Mistress that sudaphed to help cure some sniffles.It ahd clearly given her a little extra "edge".
Turning off the stove, I grabbed a jacket, and jumped in the car for the short drive to the "crime scene". Sadly, when I arrived there was no yellow tape, but there were two police cars with blue lights flashing, slowing traffic as drivers rubbernecked to see what was up so early in our normally tranquil little town.
Mistress was in a rather heated discussion with a Sergeant who had been called to provide "back-up", apparently because Mistress had become a little pissy when she was told she had to stand on the sidewalk, or she would be taken into custody, rather than step inside the adjoining restaurant for her breakfast meeting.
I think what annoyed Mistress the most was that the rather large and bullyish officer who had stopped her had demanded to know "what her business was" in the neighborhood, when in fact she had grown up here. I mean, should you have to explain why you are stepping into a restaurant at breakfast time?
In any event, I urged Mistress to exercise her right to remain silent, and tried to engage the Sergeant in a little snappy patter, as the apprehending officer took about 15 minutes to confirm that Mistress was not a fugitive from justice or an illegal immigrant, before issuing her the jaywalking citation. And after she was released, the crowd inside the restaurant gave her a round of applause for surviving this display of overwhelming force by our local Keystone Kops.
All of this was a little disturbing at the time. Plus my eggs were getting cold.
But afterwards we did have a bit of a chuckle.
"Mistress, you came close to getting taken into custody.... and before they slipped you into the holding cell, they probably would have gotten a matron to do a full body cavity search....."
"You don't think they would have done that, do you, Slave?"
"Absolutely..... but at least it would have been convenient to do the search.... after all, you had your peek-a-boo tights on."
I think from now on Mistress will think about what she's wearing before she walks against a "Don't Walk" signal.
