Please notice the attached photo. You may agree there is great similarity in the packaging of these very different items, and that may help you to understand how I knew it was Monday morning, even without the help of a calendar.
It was my own fault. Yesterday, while I was cleaning out the drawers in the master bathroom, the phone rang. I became distracted and didn't get back to finish putting the last few items back where they belong. Then this morning, before coffee, I reached for a few of my regular AM items and things didn't go exactly according to plan.
First, I grabbed the smaller tube in the photo, put a line of paste on my toothbrush and as I made those first few brushing motions, I realized the texture was wrong and the taste was way the heck off. It wasn't Crest toothpaste. No, it was Preparation H. Ew! I was rinsing and spitting hot water for several minutes trying to get the taste out of my mouth. The good news is that my gum tissue isn't swollen or bleeding and probably won't be for some time to come.
Still spitting a bit, I took my shower, shampooed and fixed my hair. The day was looking up. But then, as I spread the Oil of Olay Regenerist across my face, it seemed a tad more viscous than usual and very, very slick. There was a reason why. It wasn't my Oil of Olay, it was sex toy lube. While certainly not the first sex related fluid to land on my face, the surprise factor was a tad overwhelming. The good news is that my face feels baby butt smooth today.
In reading back over this account of the pre-dawn, pre-coffee happenings in our home this morning, I see that I have left out a few choice words that I may have uttered after each event of misplaced product. I'll leave my actual word choice to your imagination. Bill, however, doesn't need to imagine because he heard those words loud and clear. In fact, my garbled yelling while the Preparation H still clung to my teeth was the first sound he heard this morning. And sadly, he had just drifted back to sleep when I sounded the "Oh, Shit!" in response to the lube on my face.
I could say that Bill wasn't amused, but that would be a lie. He was as amused as he can be first thing in the morning...to the point of doubling over, pointing and snorting as he laughed! And when he stopped laughing and said he wanted to find a way to help reset my attitude and to also express his deep appreciation for waking him an hour before his alarm clock, I knew I was in trouble.
Mr. Bill grabbed the ping pong paddle and his favorite flogger, had me lay across the end of the bed, and proceeded to really warm up my butt. There were swats for not finishing what I started, a few for my colorful language, a few for the look I gave him when he laughed, and a few on general principle.
Being a good Dom, a very good Dom, he really did know what I needed. And as he lay with his body on top of mine, his front to my red hot ass, I knew what he needed, too. I moved my butt against his penis just right, knowing he wouldn't be able to resist, and we continued on to the point that we both experienced an even better start to the day! Gotta love that!
Hugs,
Donna
Donna, maybe you can story board this for a Super Bowl Ad next year! I'm sure the folks at Preparation H could get some buzz going!
