Femdom Hits the Times

Mistress and slave are returning all too quickly to River City today, after a final day of bright sunshine and two-a-day sex. The gloom of the midwest awaits, though we will only be there for about a week before heading "across the pond" to visit our daughter "studying" in France for the holidays.

Yesterday, I unearthed Mistress's favorite power tool to give her a special treat before we joined some friends for dinner. She seemed to enjoy a little variety from my devoted tongue, and after a vibrant and quavering cum, she gave her slave permission to fuck her.  You can bet I took full advantage of the opportunity.

Otherwise, I tried to be on my best behavior, the smack of the riding crop on my tender aging ass still fresh in my memory.

I did note an interesting article that I shared with Mistress while perusing the NY Times on line. The Sunday Style section has long featured a column called "Modern Love". with guest writers sharing tales of romance and heartbreak that usually border on the overly sentimental, and not particularly "modern" at all. At least in this slave's perspective.

But yesterday there was a strangely amusing tale from a woman who was approached via OKCupid by a guy who wanted to be her "houseboy". What emerges is a funny tale of this lady trying to play the Domme for a guy in return for him driving her to Ikea and maybe cleaning her apartment.

Not sure why he approached her. And she may not be particularly mainstream either, since she confesses to having a video series on YouTube featuring her lolling in her bathtub smoking cigarettes, drinking marinis and singing karaoke. Check it out here: Ladies of Leisure .

While it isn't a particularly sexy tale, it's worth a read if only to see Femdom take a slight bow in our nation's "paper of record".  Here's the link: Houseboy Wanted to Serve Me. There's even a cute video that goes with it.  The conclusion appears to be that she was just not that Domme-ish. Even if she did do her best in order to get some housework done.

Do "Manly" Husbands Really Get More Action?

The New York Times Sunday magazine had an article yesterday that got Mistress and Slave laughing. Does a More Equal Marriage Mean Less Sex?

The author  tosses off a variety of  half-baked  theories on the state of modern marriage based on a study that she claims shows (no link to it is provided so I can't verify)  that couples in more "egalitarian" marriages, where child care and household tasks and decisions are shared,  have sex 1.5 less times per month than couples in more "traditional"  marriages.

One thing that  was hard to pin down is what constitutes an "egalitarian" vs. "traditional" marriage. The author's  focus seems to be on whether the husband does a significant share of the child care, cooking, vacuuming and laundry. If they do, well then, things are coming up short for them in the bedroom, presumably because the wife no longer sees husband as a compelling manly hunk.

On the other hand, if the man of the house focuses on yard work, log splitting and hunting for game to put on the table, well.... he's scoring bigger in bed. That is if you count 1.5 times a month more a big score.

From this premise, the writer launches into a number of social theories, including that there is less sexual satisfaction in a marriage when the wife brings home a bigger salary than the man; and that women who are "better educated" than their husbands tend to "cheat" more.

Of course, here at the UCTMW HQ we had a little trouble comparing those apples to our oranges.

"1.5 times a month less, Mistress.... all because I like to cook and help with the laundry?"

"Do you feel deprived Slave?"

"No.... I think I'm pretty well satisfied. We even have readers like Harry and Suzanne that say you indulge me too much. If I vacuumed, would you cut me back to 8 times a week?"

"When was the last time you vacuumed, Slave?"

I confessed it had been quite a while.

"I guess the fact that we now leave the vacuuming to our gay, male house-cleaner  confirms the thesis of this article, Mistress."

There was one gaping hole in this article: 1.5 times per month less than what? The writer never reports what the baseline norm was in the "control group" of households, where the more macho traditional husband  only sneers at the idea of whipping up dinner, or dropping little Johnny off at school, and then drops his sweaty gym clothes on the floor so his less educated, stay at home wife can secretly sniff up his genetically different secretions before spreading her legs for him, hopefully before he showers. (You have to read the article, I suppose).

But you can read a little deeper into this by doing the math. In a later paragraph, the author says that the 1.5 times a month penalty a guy endures for cooking and cleaning amounts to a 17% reduction. So with my limited algebra skills I worked it out. If a 1.5 times "sex reduction" is 17% of your "traditional marriage" total, then that total is a whopping 8.8 times of sex per month.

So your average bring home the bacon, chop the wood, go hunting on the weekend with the guys manly husband is only getting it 8.8 times per month?  No wonder the internet porn industry is doing so well, and so many folks download pictures of Molly's ass for imagination stimulation purposes!

Here at the UCTMW World HQ, where this humble Slave is happy to do the laundry, cook a good percentage of the meals, and wear a cock cage on command, that 8.8 represents a typical WEEK! And I'm past 60. Presumably this study includes guys in their 20's, 30s and 40s, when at their sexual peaks, not way over the hill like me.

 I also wonder how that study defines "sex". Are they using the traditional "Bill Clinton, "I did not have sex with that woman" definition? I am not counting in our 8 times / week total  the times when Mistress gets worshiped and her slave is not indulged. Or when Mistress makes a pit stop at her lover Jay's house. Those are just bonus cums for her, I suppose.

Obviously, this "study" used the wrong control group. They need to look at couples where the wife takes charge!

Inside UCTMW Week.... The Editorial Board Meeting

A few weeks back, Mistress and Slave watched a documentary (via Netflix) about our favorite newspaper, called "Page One: Inside the New York Times." The point was to open the door and look at the decision making processes that grind out the daily news feed from that "Grey Lady". I suspect the doors were opened at the Times to an independent filmmaker in a probably fruitless attempt to put some human faces on an institution that tries a little too hard to pretend to be God on most days, and has taken its share of lumps from the right wing and the markets in the last decade.... but who are we to judge.

Of course, here at UCTMW we fancy ourselves as at the pinnacle of cheesy sex blog journalism, so why not open up the process a little so all of  you aspiring Mollys and Micks can see how things really get done around here.

Take for example, the role our Publisher, Molly Collins plays in giving a final stamp of approval on our daily output.

As it happens, Mick is usually in charge of  written content on the blog, with the exception of occasional postings from the Publisher's desk .

Indeed, when Molly asks the night before, "what are you going to write about tomorrow, Slave", I am usually coy. For two reasons: 1) I really have no fucking idea: and 2) I like to surprise her with my daily spin on our work and play -a-day lives.  The true test of my success here is not how many page views or shout-outs we get, but whether I get some sort of rise from her as she reads the blog and I work my tongue and lips across her legendary clean shaven folds.

But there is one aspect of the blog where Molly exercises complete editorial control: displays of her likeness.  Take last night for example.

We had arrived home from our weekend trip, and had settled into a nice evening of catching up with the accumulated newspapers and watching some TV (nice Woody Allen bio-documentary on PBS). AS we watched I told Mistress I was going to download some photos from "Switch Day" for the blog.

This definitely got her attention. No sooner had they appeared on the screen than she was leaning over my shoulder, critiquing, approving, or sending some of the photos to the trash bin.

"That one's OK, Slave...."

"Ick.... not that one!"

I've learned not to argue on these matters.  though at one point I noted that the approved photo of her lush ass, reddened by by spanks, was not much different than the one she had condemned, which featured her ass msucles clenched tight as she bucked against her favorite power tool.

"Too many lines, Slave....."

But as you cans see, she did find a few shots that met her discerning eye.

As you can see from the photo montage, Slave did bring sufficient supplies to catch up on some missed Switch Day opportunities over the last few weeks. There was the restraining of Mistress's wrists and ankles; a nice firm spanking, in honor of the re-emergence of E, who has a bit of a spanking fetish that Mistress would so clearly like to accommodate; and then as a final "punishment" I slid the magic wand between those clenched thighs, making Mistress squirm and ultimately beg for permission to come.

I do love the way her ass muscles get so tight in those final throes of abandon. But alas, that photo ended up on the cutting room floor. (Maybe our readers can persuade her to authorize that shot, but I've given up).

When Mistress had her fill, one of those emotional cums that had her face red and damp with tears, I released her ankles and wrists, and flipped her over for a nice thorough fucking.  But, always the good Slave, I made sure to ask permission too.