Downton Domme

Sunday night Mistress and I spent the evening at home, fireplace roaring. We whipped up some pasta Alfredo and a salad and then settled down in front of the TV for the launch of the final season of one of Mistress's long time favorite shows: Downton Abby.

It's been a long five years since the Crawley clan began their odyssey across two decades of the decline of the English aristocracy. And Slave has a sorry history of making snarky comments at the "plight" of a family forced to suffer the indignity of being short a footman or two when serving a betwixt courses consomme to  dinner guests like "Shrimpy" and his ill tempered wife. Or warding off the sexual antics of some low level Turkish envoy who found his way into one of their daughter's "chambers".

Mistress gave me strict instructions as we suffered through the introductory countdown to the first new episode: "slave I don't want to hear you making snide comments once the show starts!"

"I guess this is where a good ball gag could come in handy, Mistress."

"Maybe I should have put that on my Christmas list, slave....."

Aspiring to be an obedient slave, I did my best  to stifle my snark. I suppose part of it is my Irish cultural affinities. My namesake here on this blog is no accident. My favorite character on Downton is the  former chauffeur with Irish Republican sympathies who bedded the youngest daughter and, once they were forced to marry, was reluctantly allowed to spend evenings upstairs. Although I think the Butler always counted the silver when said former chauffeur dined with the family.

Once the episode ended, and slave was allowed to express some views about what had transpired, our conversation shifted to how the series might end:

"Do you think they'll have to lay off the staff and  sell off the house and all those ancestral paintings and tea services, Mistress?"

"That seems to be where it's heading, slave."

But then I had a better idea.

"Lady Mary with that riding crop and in those boots was kind of hot, Mistress... Now that she seems to be settling into spinster-hood, maybe she can embrace her inner Domme and open a dungeon in the basement to bring in some extra cash!"

Mistress seemed open minded to the notion. And when you think of it, 'Lady' Mary does have that sort of haughty, no fool tolerance quality that could make for a good Domme. And all those Brit twits suitors who seem to flutter around her could certainly use a good  pegging to get their pathetic little lives back in order and make them productive members of society once their trust funds run out. Maybe those costume signers can design an historically accurate strap-on for  Lady Mary to deploy on some groveling Lord or Duke before the series concludes. Then your local PBS affiliate could  use genuine replicas as premiums for their next fund raising drive.

I wonder if it's too late to get this story idea to the guy who writes all this clap trap? And can I get some royalties. At least enough to invest in a comfortable ball gag for the remaining episodes.