To Cage or Not to Cage?

In response to Thursday's blog, the WC left a lengthy comment summarizing his take away from all these years of following us here at UCTMW....

Apparently he's been keeping track of all of Slave's many excuses for persuading Mistress that this is not a good day for confinement in my cage. After all, there are circumstances when wearing that tight steel cock cage is inconvenient, hazardous, or just too uncomfortable for a pampered house Slave to bear.

I'm thinking that someone with a clever capacity for rhyme could turn this litany into a kinky Dr. Seuss knock-off, but that is not my forte. So here it is:






Not too hot

Not too cold

Not too wet

Not too busy

Not while sleeping

Not while traveling

Not while bathing

Not while biking

Not while fucking... duh....


Not while being fucked in the ass.

Not while swimming

Not while waterboarding (or being waterboarded)

Not while hiking

Not while skiing

Not while bowling

Not while golfing

Not while skateboarding

Not while snowboarding either......

Not while exercising

Not on weekends

Not in any month that ends with an y

Not in any month that ends with an r either......

And I'm pretty sure

Not any month that ends with an h l e or t too

Not while doing ballet

Not while doing any other kind of dancing either

Not while thinking

Not while reading

Not while walking

Not while sitting

Not while driving

Not while rock climbing

Not while hang gliding

Not while parasailing

Not while gambling

And especially

Not while pontificating .............

Suzanne, Harry

Did I miss anything?



I must say that this takes things a little too far, WC.  But you did forget to add "not on days involving air travel or entering buildings with metal detectors".

For the record,  I'm not into gambling, so that one hasn't been tested yet. I did wear the cage this week while lecturing and fundraising. And I've certainly worn it while worshiping. So those are off the list.

But this got me thinking about good candidates for cock cages..... maybe, for starters,  the entire Congress until they decide to re-open our gubmint. Here are too candidates in particular, who have the sort of Shutdown bromance going that would make Bill and Monica (the last big Shutdown romance) blush.

1,000,000 Page Viewers Can't Be Wrong

Or can they?

We've been edging closer to that number for several weeks. So now we're there. More than a Million page views here at UCTMW over the last almost 4 years of blogging. That includes 1260 posts. And I'm not including that brief but silly life we spent over at our companion blog Mistress and Slave on the Lam.

Molly and Mick are in a much different place than we were when we began this silly enterprise back in November 2009:

More secure in our relationship, at least so it seems to me. Kids out of the nest (though one returned last night for a little fall break R & R).

Mistress has a few extra extracurricular lovers under her belt.... that have created opportunities to amuse and entertain here.

Slave is a little grayer, and a little closer to hanging up his business suits and eagerly moving onto the next phase of life.

We've enjoyed making some new friends here in the blog-o-sphere, seeing friendly competitors or "staff members" come and go, or shift into their own new phases.

And it's fair to say we have down shifted here.... We're not doing the daily entry thing that kept all those page views piling up for several years. Our blog was therapeutic for Mick and Molly. But the therapy seems to have worked, and is not nearly as necessary as it was back in 2009 when we kicked things off here.

How long will we keep at it? That's not clear. Maybe as long as it's fun and mutually entertaining.

In the meantime, I may go out and look for a a sparkly gold tuxedo.

HNT / Long Day in the Cage

Fortunately, Slave was able to overcome the effects of cooler weather, and get that hard steel ring to seat properly yesterday, containing my cock and balls through coffee brewing and wake-up sex in the UCTMW Executive Suite until Mistress was able to put my on full lock down before sending me off to work.

And it was a long day..... morning in the office.... a lunch time lecture to a group of about 50 fellow professionals down the street.... back to the office.... pick up some snacks and beverages for a reception Mistress and I were hosting for a candidate for public office at the end of the day.... back slapping.... schmoozing.... etc, etc.

Fortunately, Mistress had time to stop by my office for some "private time" before the candidate and our guests arrived.

"How's the cage, Slave?"

"Tight Mistress.... it is a little odd being up there in the front of a crowd, trying to sound all cool and professional and charming .... flipping through my power point... but knowing I've got that steel contraption on too...."

"Do you think anyone could tell?"

"Not that crowd, Mistress.... my guess is they'd never even consider the possibility."

There was just enough time to squeeze in a little pre-reception worship behind my closed office door. You know the drill..... Hopefully our guests could not detect the sweet musk of Mistress's clean shaven folds on my face. And I doubt they even considered checking for a lump of hardened steel below my beltline. They may have been too distracted by the fact that the candidate's zipper was at half-mast in a rather ill fitting suit....

How do you tell someone who's running for state office that his fly's not firmly in place? But I guess it's better than saying "Hey Pal.... your cock cage is showing."

Cage Malfunction

A cold front that followed that Biblical rain that squelched Glamor Boy's aspirations for a fourth quarter comeback on Sunday put Slave into some dangerous territory yesterday morning.

Mistress had asked me to wear the cage on Monday, but we had an early wake up call, and I was a little groggy when I went down to make the coffee. I forgot to bring my little steel ring - the base of my cock cage- for all that early morning squishing and cramming required to get my balls and dick through the aperture.

On cold mornings, it's necessary to do this important preparatory work when things are still all loosy goosy down there, because a little cold weather triggers some sort of natural defense mechanism, making that fleshy sack that contains the "family jewels" shrivel and contract.... nature wanted to keep them warm apparently. And once that contraction occurs.... well the squishing and smushing into that ring becomes impossible. There's very little to gran onto, push and pop into the ring

So that was the problem Monday.... Slave forgot and by the time he remembered, nature had done it's work and it was too late.

Mistress did not take it too badly.... "OK SLave.... tomorrow then....."

Tuesday morning I remembered my task, got the ring mounted properly first thing while the coffee was brewing. I was prepared to treat Mistress to one of those particular firm cock's contained by my ring. But the trip to the driveway to get the morning paper must have been my undoing. When I arrived upstairs for some hot wake-up sex I discovered that one recalcitrant ball had figured a way to retreat back through the tight ring.... apparently it was offended by the cold weather and took shelter.

And believe me, you don't want to try to have sex with one ball in and the other cramped somewhere nasty .

I described my plight to Mistress.....

"Hmmm..... OK, Slave.  We don't want you to hurt yourself....."

So I took the ring off and tried to please Mistress as best I could.

Last night Mistress made it clear that today was definitely a cage day. The ring is already on tight. I may have to wait until after wake up sex, and the cover is securely in place before I go out and get the paper.

Three strikes, and my ass may be out.