Never Trust a Woman With an Assault Rifle in a Bikini

Slave made it home late Friday afternoon, and the breaking of my long streak of sexual abstinence occurred at approximately 7:30 pm Eastern time here at the UCTMW World HQ. It had actually been since Tuesday morning, in retrospect, because of some ridiculously early wake-up and get home times last week. Hopefully the coming week will be much better.

Both of out daughters have house guests this weekend. The older Co-Ed's boyfriend is here, but they've been keeping a low profile, with one night spent at a friend's house closer to the fun night life. And last night, they went out to dinner and got home after the old farts went to bed. If there was some bed sharing it happened while we were sleeping, because I noticed he was in the fold out bed solo on our ground floor this am.

Hopefully no one was too awoken by Mistress and Slave enjoying their first wake-up sex in here Saturday morning.

Mistress did "confess" that whilst I was out of town she spent some time over at her former lover Jay's house drinking some wine out on his desk while his son entertained himself inside.

"There was a little making out again Slave, when he walked me to my car.... but that was about it."

Jay seems a tad confused about how to handle Mistress.

But today's headline is not about Mistress, of course. It's about a woman who caught our eye last weekend, when news broke that some Texas man, former Army, had been arrested for sending threatening letters laced with ricin to the President and the Mayor of NYC.  At the time there was a link in the article to their respective facebook pages and we were amused to see their rather strange predilections laid out for all the world to see and "like". He was into guns and "freedom". She claimed she was an actress with roles in "The Walking Dead"and other bad TV shows. But what caught our attention was this photo of her:

This and other photos on her page had a very dommish look to them.

"Do you think she gets powder burns on her cleavage, Mistress?"

"Not sure, Slave...."

And I wonder how accurate you can fire off a few dozen rounds wearing those heels. Let's hope the recoil is not too intense.



We don't shoot much here at UCTMW, relying on Bill our Director of Security for any "wet work" of that type.

The story at the time was that Shannon Guess had gotten suspicious of her husband's activities, and contacted the FBI when she read about these nastygrams that threatened bodily harm if either the President or the Mayor stopped by to pick up his arsenal of firearms.

Now the story is that she's been arrested for framing the husband, and father of her 5 kids, even going to the trouble of planting a few extra castor beans (from which ricin is derived) in his trunk. And, even worse, it turns out that no one at "Walking Dead" ever heard of the lady. "Producers Never Heard of Ricin Suspect"

If the government really is snooping on our facebook pages as some now claim, they clearly weren't paying close enough attention to this lady. Or maybe they just got distracted.

At least I'm hoping that this photo provides a little fodder for the WC now that he's on the long road to recovery from the excesses of World Masturbation Month.

Desperately Awaiting Reunion With Mistress

We've been pretty quiet here the last few days because Slave has been off to our nation's capitol visiting   one of my older daughters who is leaving her current job for further life adventures.  They gave her an amazing send off, and she was nice enough to let her parents participate.

I'm lucky to be a guy who gets to see and watch a child do amazing things.

Before leaving town early Thursday morning Mistress and Slave had a particularly stressful 24 hours or so, so our normal dosage of sexual release was missing. Yes, I made sure to worship Mistress Wednesday evening after we got home later than normal, but there was none of the post worship fucking that usually follows.

So, by now, its been more than 2 days since the normally pampered Mick has the proper discharge of pent up bodily fluids. I know.... you're all feeling sorry for me....

Before I left, Mistress and I had the "cage talk". She would have liked to have me securely locked up here. She knows that in my earlier days, there was more than one babe here in the hothouse of our nation's political life that I was accustomed to calling on after a busy work day for a little nooky.

But that was many years ago. Slave's cleaned up that particular act.

It was also before there were metal detectors in airports and all these official buildings. And yesterday I was definitely in high security country. They even did something funny with my I-Phone at one entrance. Maybe they thought I was a spy?

Can you imagine what those guys would have done if the alarm went off as I passed through the metal detector and their wands found a big lump of steel wrapped around my privates?  I'm not sure my daughter would have been amused.

Mistress pondered whether  I should bring my cage, to put on and take off when security was not an issue.

Ultimately she gave me a pass. But it does make me wonder if I should get a plastic device for back-up on such occasions.

So Mistress simply imposed the no touch rule, which, despite some folks' scepticism, has been rigorously followed.

I just hope my flight gets out of here on time this afternoon, because I am already desperately anticipating this evening's encounters with Mistress once I finally get home.

Western Correspondent MIA?

Despite the fact that his seminal work here on such matters as ass fucking still continues to draw clicks at UCTMW, we've not heard much other than the occasional snide comment from our Western Correspondent lately.

(In fact, this post about Slave Positions from the WC is the all time leader here, with more than 7100 views; this one about taking a lady's behind comes in 3rd with more than 6200 views.)

This led our Senior Correspondent Donna to speculate that there may be some concerns about Miguel's health, as shown by this cute little e-card she just passed on:

But at least we know that if this is the WC's excuse for not sharing much of late, it's not because he's been doing too much keyboarding.

Sleeping Arrangements

Mistress and Slave tried to do our best to make up for a buys week, and an even busier week to come by lolling in bed a bit longer yesterday morning. There were morning papers to peruse, but it wasn't long before Slave deployed Mistress's favorite power tool to ply her clean shaven folds for a lovely mega-cum before I exploited my privilege of fucking her with robust abandon.

By the time we were done, it seemed our morning had been very well spent.

After that there was a nice bike-ride in unusually cool summer sunshine, breakfast out on our deck that Mistress prepared, and a variety of home and yard projects for me. We even crammed a nap into the late afternoon fun before I prepared dinner for Mistress and our two cute Co-Eds.

Both of them have guests coming later this week. The older one has his frat boy boyfriend coming for a weekend visit. The younger one has an exchange student from England coming in with plans to attend some huge music festival in Tennessee the following weekend.

Mistress is the consummate planner around here so she was already disclosing the arrangements she planned to make for our house guest.

"Georgia can sleep in the blue room upstairs. And I'll get linens out for Mike for the fold out couch in the room in the basement".

But this got Co-Ed No. 2 all a twitter.

"She's 21 you know...."

The implication was that our older daughter should be able to decide where and with whom her boyfriend will sleep.

I was a little startled, since We've never attempted to dictate sleeping arrangements with our teens, even when the oldest was still in high school. There were many nights when her boyfriend would spend the night in our lower level without any barriers placed to prevent a visit from our daughter after the parents adjourned to the executive suite. At the same time, Mistress made sure that she was fully contracepted. (is that a word?)

"No one's going to be checking on who's in who's bed.... just that .... well....."

Slave had a little trouble articulating our variation of the "don't ask, don't tell" policy with both of them sitting there, and the oldest, who was the purported subject of this conversation, making no comment at all.  I mean, I didn't want to say "If and when she so desires, your sister can sleep with her boyfriend downstairs, where they won't have to worry about waking up the boring parents in the next room."  But I suppose that's what I was saying. There are some details a father just does not want to know about the sex lives of his daughters. Just like the daughters don't want to know about the sex lives of their parents.

The younger sister wasn't getting it though... sticking with her theme that we had no business suggesting that Mike's "place" would be downstairs when he visits this weekend.

So, dear readers,  you have one more example why we miss our empty nest. Any thoughts on how Mistress and Slave handle this conundrum?