Friday, December 16, 2016

Slim Pickins'

With an extended trip to our SW hideaway planned, slave had the “clever”  idea that it might be fun to help Mistress recruit a Southwestern side-dish on AM. All you have to do is change one’s zip code on your profile and, “wa-la”, instant access to a pool of sexy cowboys and rugged individualists itching to please an exotic, sexually adventurous  beauty such as Molly Collins.

Well…. that was the theory. Maybe all those guys have moved to some other web site that I’m not aware of. But so far the pool seems pretty fished out.

There is one guy from Santa Fe we’ve exchanged some emails with, along with an offer to meet for a drink one afternoon. But he’s gotten a little tedious already, with a little too much bragging about the size of his wine cellar and his forays to upscale restaurants.

“If we’re talking about size slave, I’m not sure it’s a wine cellar I’m interested in.”

Then there is his reaction to Mistress’s candid statement that her husband gives her permission and would be fully updated on any of their prospective interactions.

“I hope he doesn’t want to watch or listen in” was his response,
“that would be a little creepy….”  He clearly has never heard of the cuckold thing.

There is another persistent fellow who fancies himself as a latter day Ricardo Montalban, who’s picture features a bushy head of white hair and matching moustache. No doubt he drives a fancy car with “fine Corinthian leather”.  But at 64 he’s really not what Mistress is looking for…. After all she’s already got one aging consort. Who needs another? Unless he brings some other guy along for a threesome?

There have been several creepy looking guys who like to send photos showing off all their tattoos. 

“Yuck”, was Mistress’s only reaction.

Then there is this guy who at least makes it clear what he’s looking for:

We both know why we are here and there is no reason to play games. I'm a 100% heterosexual man who enjoys sex with a woman, concentrating on her erogenous zones and am looking for open minded and sensual women who desire to receive as well as give sensual pleasure. I like conversation and foreplay, but also like to cut to the chase and enjoy, as I am a busy and well educated small business owner who works in a physical profession. Not really kinky but you only live once so definitely open to some different experiences... tell me what really turns you on!

What turns me on the most is a confident, adventurous woman who does not play head games and is ready for not just friendship but also sexual intimacy at all times.

Now at least he can cut to the chase….my guess is he doesn’t have a wine cellar, but that “at all times” line makes you wonder if he’s  looking for the Uber version of a sexual partner.

Then there’s a guy from Colorado – purportedly single who’s profile name is “Likes to Sneak Around”.  He claims he is “ready to get crazy naked”, and notes that “I really love pleasing women, taking them to the brink and keeping them there until they can’t take it no more.”

While Mistress might appreciate Mr. Sneak Around’s aspirations, I think she’d be taken aback by his notion of good grammar.

The bottom line: it may be hard to find a suitable match for Mistress on line in a part of the country that is sparsely populated.  Not enough fish in the sea.  Compare that to the rather prolific adventures of Rebecca over at Lapsed Catholic Wife as summarized this week in her year end up date.  Becs, I’m wondering how you find the time to fit them all in?

So at this point Mistress is still shopping. Maybe  Slim Pickens will just fall out of the sky some day and surprise her with his moves.


3 comments:

  1. I'm not sure what the best part of this post is. The writing? The absurdly appropriate pictures? I'm going to refuse to choose!

    ReplyDelete
  2. The photographs are superb and I am glad that you too get ludicrous writings on Ashley Madison, it makes me chuckle

    ReplyDelete

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