Our Man in Sochi

It was -6 degrees last night in Denver, the home of our roving Western Correspondent. So it's no wonder he got on a plane and headed to Sochi for some spontaneous reporting on the Winter Olympics. I'm wondering how he was able to get his high end lubricant through security though, considering all this paranoia about terrorists concealing explosives in toothpaste tubes. And I just hope I remembered to cancel his UCTMW Titanium AmEx card.  For a little verisimilitude, I suggest imagining this compelling narrative delivered at slope side in the voice of the inimitable (but often imitated) Howard Cosell, dressed in the fur coat that Joe Namath wore to Sunday's Super Bowl.

 Well I know a little bit about winter sports

Bodie Miller is my favorite ski racer

Just like Tiger Woods is my favorite golfer

Bodie is the best American ski racer ever having won in all 5  alpine events and the most World Cup victories of any American in history

He is now 36  years old and if he were to win Olympic gold he would become the oldest  man ever to do so at 36

He did not ski at all last year because of injury

Today at downhill training at Sochi he finished FIRST!

The race is Sunday on TV  in America

It is a pretty easy downhill by World Cup standards

My take

He has fast skis for gliding on an easy course

Gliding means relaxing and letting your skies go where they want

Very scary and hard to do at high speed

Ask me

I have done the splits at 80 mph and slid down the slope on my face

Gave my face character:)

The manufacturers like to give Americans fast skis during the Olympics because the US market is the biggest

The biggest market by far is Denver

More ski shit is sold in Denver each year than in any other market in the world

And it is on sale here every fall for 10 cents on the dollar

Nevertheless

I would be just as happy if Bodie wins the downhill as I would have been if my beloved Broncos had won the Supper bowl 

Colorado's own Lindsey Vonn is out because of a knee injury

She of being Tiger's squeeze fame 

She  only has  to win three more races to pass AnaMarie of Austria to win the most World Cup races of any woman in history

Ted Liggety is the best American medal hope in Alpine skiing

He was the first man since Jean Claud Kiley to win 3 gold metals in Alpine skiing in a world championship or Olympics . The guy that got shot by Claudine Longe

Liggety did that 2 years ago...  

He is really good

But my buddy Jim E. (college team mate of mine)  beat him in a fun race last year at Park City where Jim's kids are all stud ski racers and Jim is l obviously still competitive 

Of Course Liggety was wearing play  skis 

And when he found out Jim beat him he went down to the parking lot and got a pair of his World Cup GS ski's

And blew Jim out by 3 and a half  seconds......

On a rutty course

Still I was proud of my buddy

There are a bunch of great young Americans racing

I wouldn't be surprised if a young American female got a medal

But for the old ones

Julie Mancuso has won several Olympic medals before 

But she is old (though she seems in pretty good shape in this photo).

But for the purposes of this sex blog she was recently pictured in some major magazine putting her hands down   her crotch in a very sexy outfit

Check it out

I only really understand ski racing 

But the kids in their slope style, half pipe, etc 

Are incredible athletes! 

With big balls

Or perhaps big clits!!!!!!!!

They act like they just throw that shit

Bit they practice year around on trampolines, pools and foam pits 

My hat is off to them

Seriously

It takes big balls to throw yourself off huge jumps

Spin three times

While flipping 3 times and land it on a very steep hill

But my advice to viewers is to watch the difference between the skiers and boarders in all these events

The skiers will go much bigger than the boarders 

That is because the skiers can hook up an edge much firmer than the boarders can

When skiing you can really set and edge and rocket out of a turn

Much harder on a board

Rock on Mick and Molly

Thanks, WC, with this incisive analysis, we all will appreciate the Winter Olympics with a finer eye. Just be check for any stray dogs in your hotel room. 

Snow Bound

A teaser headline always gives our page views a pop. I'll bet a lot of you had this of "snow bound" in mind:

But no one actually got tied up here yesterday in River City. It was more like this, as Slave tried to deal with the wet, heavy parfait of snow, then ice, then more snow that blanketed us here in the heartland:

 

But at least we had plenty of advance notice, and cleared our respective schedules so we could both hang out at the UCTMW World HQ together. Slave had packed a "blizzard box" of  papers to work on at home, and Mistress, as her own "boss" (what else would she be?)  has a very flexible work schedule, so could easily shift some meetings around, allowing both of us to avoid slippery highways.

Of course, there was some hot wake-up sex, and we could loll in bed a little longer than normal. Though Slave earned a demerit (and a prospective punishment) but not waiting to come until permission was granted. I guess I've gotten a little to used to Mistress's typical quick assent, and when she hesitated.... well..... Oops. And She called me on it.

"You may have to be punished for that, Slave."

Slave did do some shoveling. It was the heaviest snow I can recall. I quickly turned the job and a $20 bill over to the teenaged neighbor. And after we put in a good day of work on our respective lap tops, we did walk to a local restaurant for dinner, dodging drifts, and returned home for some Mistress cock riding to end our day. Rest assured I did not make the same mistake twice!

Of course we are not the only folks caught up in this cycle of slush. We got a whiney email last night from Suzanne about her sad plight on the East Coast, where they were buried once again. Though I suspect the real reasons she is in a grumpy mood is that her two lovers have been under the weather and have not provided the diversions and stimulation that she has come to expect. Let's just hope she has a back up generator to keep her hitachi humming in case the snow and ice disrupts her electric service. If Tammy and Jay are not back in action soon, I would advise Suzanne to add a little more depth to her roster.

But we agree, Suzanne. This winter has gotten insufferable. We like snow, but only out West, where we can hit the slopes, or, as we did a few years back, find an isolated camp ground for some outdoor fun, Molly and Mick style:

Love that tan line!

Cheap Advice from Mick and Molly to a Might Be Cuckold

A couple of weeks back, Slave ventured into the counter-advice column business, figuring it to be a one-off , useful in filling up the column inches here, particularly in the absence of any meaningful contributions of late from our Western Correspondent, who must still be licking the wounds endured when his geldings took the field in the Meadow Lands on Sunday.

The lopsided Seahawks victory had me wondering if in true Jersey tradition, the lads from Denver were advised by one of Chris Christie’s high school chums just before game time that it “was not their night”,  the way Marlon Brando got the news from his older brother, played by Rod Stieger in “On the Waterfront”. 

But then I saw this request for advice in the Washington Post yesterday that was right up our alley, and figured the writer needed a little more common sense than “Dear Prudence” had in her limited range of experience:

Paternity

My wife and I have a female-led relationship. Before we got married, I agreed that she could "take other lovers", while I would remain faithful to her alone. She said that she might not ever see anyone else, but she liked that I knew she *could*. Well, now she's pregnant, and I'm wondering the obvious. We do have intercourse, but not often. She was away on business near the time she would have conceived. I don't know whether she's ever had another lover. I could have asked that before, but now I'm afraid of how it would come across. Should I ask, or just wait to see if the baby looks like me?

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February 03, 2014 7:02 AM

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A.

Emily Yoffe :

Thank you for informing me of the phrase "female-led relationship." From reading the definition, I see that it doesn't necessarily mean that the wife take lovers while the husband is home making soup. It just means she is in charge. (Hear that, Darling, it's not me being intolerably bossy, it's a lifestyle!)  In an earlier day, writer John Mortimer delightfully appropriated the term, She Who Must Be Obeyed, to describe this sort of relationship in Rumpole of the Bailey.  But just because you agreed your wife would  set the terms of both her behavior and yours doesn't mean you are not now entitled to rethink things. If you say you want to talk about the pregnancy and the child's possible paternity and she orders you into the dungeon, then you two are suffering from a failure to communicate. One of the basics of embarking on parenthood is knowing how the event came to be.  If you're afraid to ask, then you need to rethink what it means to raise a child together not as equal partners.  I assume you don't want your offspring to think of dad as a timid, quivering wreck. If you don't have the guts to discuss this up with your wife, then maybe you can pass her a note saying you'd like the engage the services of a marriage counselor so that you have a safe place to talk to her.

–     February 03, 2014 12:07 PM

Here is what Molly and Mick would say to this confused sap and his Domme:

Those of us in “female led relationships” certainly subscribe to the notion that the wife has every right to play the field when on a business trip, or even when hubby is simonizing the floors in the den. It’s been in Mick’s contract from the very beginning, and Molly has oft exercised that privilege for more than a few cums  from a variety of macho lovers.

But the particular  thrill of the cuckold relationship is in giving a full after action read out to the humbled cuckold who’s imagination has been forced to run wild while his wife is running free.  For Mick it allows his competitive juices to flow as he seeks to please Mistress as best he can when she returns to the marital bed, none the worse for wear (though sometimes a little stiff and sore depending on the physical dexterity and vigor  of her alternative lover).

And Molly seems to relish the opportunity to tease Slave with her upcoming evening (or afternoon) plans, sometimes making sure he is locked in the cage and not tempted to violate that “no touch” rule. She is not burdened with the hassle of sneaking about or covering her tracks.

Heck, it works for us, and our sense is that we are part of a growing trend who use these dynamics to keep their marriage hot and fresh.

So we can’t understand why a wife with “privileges” would fail to tell her husband all the juicy details …. Or at least some of the hot highlights if she has found a fetching side dish while at an otherwise dreary business trip.

So what does a confused might be cuck do when confronted with a pregnant wife: being a Dad is no easy chore, and in a female led household, you are likely to do much more than 50% of the diaper changing, laundry, middle of the night feeding, and (later) soccer practice driving. There’s no reason why you can’t have a satisfying parental role and bond whether or not your chromosomes are in the mix. But if it’s something that is going to stick in your craw, best to politely ask the question that is top of mind now and clear the air.

And consider reminding her that she has no reason to conceal her future “free ranging” because if anything full disclosure might make things even hotter around the homestead.

Molly and mick

Raucous Weekend at the UCTMW World HQ

Before I get onto the subject of today's blog, it's worth reaching back to Friday's post about recent fashion trends on the grooming and maintenance of the female "thatch". In response to my question about her lover Jay's preference, Mistress made it very clear:

"Oh, Jay definitely likes things clean shaven down there Slave.... I'm sure he'd be against anything that would cover me up...."  Mistress made it clear that Jay likes to spend time grazing the clean shaven folds every bit as much as her Slave does.

Comments from Donna and Sin also suggested their preference for "de-forestation". I'm wondering if that has something to do with "guidance" on the subject they have received from Bill and Bid Bad?

On the other hand, Suzanne, who comes from a more fashionable metropolitan area, seemed to suggest that she goes for the "landing strip" approach. I can imagine her lover Jay needing the help of those fancy flashing red lights to guide him home after a long night at a Patriot's game. But where does the de-icing station come in? Is that Tammy's job?

We were in no need of de-icing here in River City this weekend. First, the seemingly endless cold snap broke and we actually got back into the 50's yesterday. Plus, with the nest finally emptied out for the weekend, we had a lots more time and space to indulge....

There was some "end of the work week" sex Friday evening here, with no plans to go anywhere.

There was pre-gym sex on Saturday morning, followed by a "warning" from Mistress that there would be some raucous afternoon sex when we got back from our respective missions to visit with our mothers.

Sure enough, after a little late afternoon nap, Slave was instructed to retrieve Mistress's harness and related supplies.

"I normally give you a cropping before your ass fucking, Slave.... but you've been pretty well behaved lately...."

Well that was a relief.

Having coached me into the proper position, Mistress proceeded to let loose on my tender bottom, taking me con mucho gusto. Once she had her fill, she shed the harness, and instructed her Slave to insert my aneros, as a little reminder of what had just transpired. I was then allowed to fuck her in the more conventional way.  I did my best to make sure she was "given" as well as I had received a few minutes earlier.

And yes, by the time the dust settled, it was pretty darned raucous.

Today we are avoiding any social interactions other than our own company.... the Super Bowl will be on, for sure, but no gathering of friends for Mistress's chili this year. We've had more than enough of other folks clogging up the nest for the last month or so. Of course, in loyalty to our Western Correspondent, I'll be pulling for the Donkeys. But I don't think PFM will put up 30 against the stout Seahawk defense.... I'm calling it 24-17, Broncos.

Good luck, Miguel!