Saturday, August 14, 2010

Still Seeking Our River City Rhythm


Mistress and Slave are struggling a bit to get back into the rhythm of our workaday life back here in River City.

It’s not just the two hour time shift that is disorienting. It’s getting used to the balance of work, child monitoring, and all the annoying social obligations that we can leave behind when we visit our lovely mountain cabin.

So yesterday, Slave woke with Mistress’s alarm, totally missing his “homework” time.  I Hate to let either Mistress or our devoted followers down when there is no update from the Collins’ to clog your blog roll.

That’s not to say that Mistress has been abandoned on the sexual front.

On Thursday we both had empty lunch schedules, and took advantage to have a quick and unhealthy lunch at a local Chili Parlor. (Yes, we do call them that).

But, before hand, Mistress stopped by my office. When she shut the door I knew that she was hankering for some of her Slave’s tongue and lip attention.  I quickly slid an upholstered chair against the door, and spread the juice absorbing blanket across Mistress’s throne. My highest and best use is my knees, lapping up Mistress’s delectable juices.

Yesterday, I woke so late that our morning sexual routine went out the window. But in the shower….Mistress clung to my neck, her head back to rinse away her aromatic conditioner, as my fingers slid through her damp and well scrubbed cunt, delivering a morning quickie.

Mistress is also trying to get on some firmer footing with M this week.

Our vacation and their busy schedules upon our return here seems to have them in a confusing and confounding place.

Here’s my take:

Mistress misses M.  She feels deeply connected to him in a number of ways. He is both a compelling Master and a comfortable and comforting confidant to her.

But at the same time, she is a strong, assertive and independent woman.. She hates to admit to herself that she has grown to depend on some daily communications with him. Or that she misses his sexy and directive voice bringing her to one of those ferocious and consuming orgasms, whether at home, in the car (while I am driving of course) or at the office.


What is a Mistress/slave to do?

Last night on the ride home (the photo shows Mistress in our car last night, her silver jewelry complementing her firm and tanned thighs), Mistress shared a bit of this angst with her slave.

“So I talked to M a bit today, Slave.”

“And?”

“I told him maybe we should back off a bit.”

“And what did he say, Mistress?”

She laughed.

“That I need a good spanking for considering suck a thing…..and I told him that’s the sort of thing he says that that  makes it hard to back off….”

“And did that turn you on, Mistress?”

“Of course it did, Slave.”

We talked about her concerns. They reminded me of some recent blogs by Sin and Aisha concerning how and why they are compelled to seek submission in their relationships.

When I questioned her more she said “Well, it’s not like we are in a real relationship, or anything.”

“But it is a real relationship, Mistress. You talk and share. It’s intimate, not just in the sex department. You like to hear from him regularly, and miss him when you don’t . And I suspect he feels the same. Maybe you don’t physically see one another…,maybe you never will. But it’s still a relationship that brings you pleasure.”

And sure enough, M was texting her even as we were driving home. And those little texts seemed to light Mistress up a tad more than her normal luminosity.

We arrived home. It was still in the 90’s and the air had the quality of a plate of melting jello that had been dumped on a oil splotched driveway.

But we still were determined to ride our  bikes to the local pool, with a chance for mistress to swim some laps.

So after Mistress had a chance to read my “cuckold” blog, while I lapped away at her molten cunt, kneeling at bed side, we saddled up, and headed out.

Later that night, as surly teen 2 camped out downstairs with friends, we finally were in bed, and Mistress’s attention turned to my cock.

“Why don’t you put in your device, Slave. I want a very hard cock tonight.”

And I was happy to deliver. But I thought maybe Mistress could use something special too.

“How would you like me to get out the Power tool, Mistress?”

“Hmmm…..that might be a good idea, Slave.”

It had been awhile. I plugged our WMO (weapon of massive orgasm) on and had it handy at bed side, as I used tongue and fingers to warm Mistress to the task. When I finally flicked it on, she was more than ready, on her back. Legs spread very wide.

I first approached her rosy little clit directly, and she moaned her delight, but then I pulled it away, using the soft white vibrating bulb to caress her inner thighs.

“Are you trying to frustrate me, Slave?”

“Of course, the better the pay-off in the end, don’t you think?”

She did not disagree.

And soon I was back at the place she finds most compelling. By now, her hips were lunging at the tool, her thighs clinging to it for dear life, even as our mouths were locked in the kiss of death.

When Mistress finally came with a deep guttural moan that must have traumatized our cats, her legs seemed to assert a life of their own, knees bent springing from side to side, long seconds after I pulled the tool away and switched it off.

And Mistress was sobbing, tears flowing as I mounted her, filling her with the hard cock that she had ordered up some minutes earlier.

“That was intense, Slave.”

An understatement.

“Yes, Mistress….I like those… Makes me feel that I have served my purpose in your life.”

And if a part of Mistress brain was thinking of words that M has whispered in her ear during orgasms past, that was fine with me.

It was a potent and powerful recipe.

Fem Dom Off Broadway

This blog does not usually go out of its way to tout popular entertainment (with the occasional exception of Man Men), but I had to share this review and accompanying photo of the play "Trust" now playing Off Broadway in the Big Apple. The guy from scrubs. The girl from Shrek. Taking one of our kinds mainstream.
http://theater.nytimes.com/2010/08/13/theater/reviews/13trust.html?scp=1&sq=Sutton%20Foster&st=cse
And Mistress sure would look lovely in that get up!

Friday, August 13, 2010

So what's all this cuckold stuff really about?

One of the little kinks featured in this blog is Mistress’s contractual right to engage in sexual activities with other men. It was thrown into our agreement because, due to lazy lawyering, I copied , then customized, a form “Slave” contract I found on the internet.

Quite frankly, before that language about Mistress’s rights was tossed into our frothy brew here in the Collins’ household, Mistress and her Slave never even talked about the “cuckold” option (though Mistress being taken by another woman was an active part of our salacious fantasy life., and once or twice, actually happened with much hotness ensuing as she recounted the tales of her exploits).

But once the words were in print, and the contract was signed, they suddenly took on a sexy life of their own.

Mistress suddenly started tossing off “available” vibes, and the flirtations began. The guys who approached her in line at the Post Office. Or in the elevator at work. Was it just her / our imagination, or was there some chemical brew that altered her pheromone outtake that was having some odd effect.

Mistress turned a random on-line “what’s up after all these years” contact into her juicy cyber flirtation with E (the college ex from the northland). She interviewed some prospective doms that came out of the woodwork through Craigslist and FetLife. She had a few steamy encounters with Sir M here in River City (referred to by one commenter as “the starter Dom”); and more recently there has been her intriguing phone – text – email relationship with M, our Western Correspondent. And she discovered that she could be both my Domme and someone else’s Sub

All in all, she seems to have enjoyed the fun, though there have been stresses, frustrations and insecurities exposed along the way.

And the surprise to me was that it was a rather compelling, if befuddling turn on. I ran the concept by a Psychologist I know, who gave me a semi-”validation”. “No, Mick, it’s not that bizarre. Just be careful with it.” She gave me a few half-baked reasons why this is a guy turn on, mostly focused on “when other guys want your wife, that confirms you have a good one.” But that hardly explained why Mistress’s descriptions about what she had done or would like to do with another guy turned me on.

More recently, I found an article posted at Psychology Today by Dr. David Ley, linked here, http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/women-who-stray/201006/kinky-cuckolding-fetish-goes-mainstreamthat goes into the phenomenon which seems to be hot these days (in both senses of “hot”). He has listed a number of potential and possibly overlapping explanations for my unanticipated reaction to Mistress’s “stepping out”. I can relate to some, say “yuck” to others.

Here goes:





“I thought I would use this posting to explore these issues, and invite discussion of what these various reasons might be. Even though this practice of wife-sharing focuses on the wife's sexuality, in my experience, this is almost always (99% of the time) prompted by the husband's request. Wives simply do not often or unprompted go to their husbands and request they have permission to have sex with other men. I will tell you that in the research for my book, I heard lots of varied reasons for this desire from various husbands. Some of the reasons were nice, and some were not so nice. I think a discussion of this phenomenon deserves consideration of all the reasons and motivations. So - here you go - my list of the motivations, based upon my research, behind why men would be interested in watching their wives with other men:
• Voyeurism - many folks suggest that we live in a "pornified culture," where most men of college-age and older have seen pornography, and use it as a part of their sexual repertoire. If they are used to such a voyeuristic process in their sexuality, there is some legitimacy to suggesting they may incorporate it into their marital sexuality. Watching your wife have sex with another man may be a next step, or progression, from watching yourselves have sex by having a mirror on the ceiling during sex, then using a video camera during sex, and then finally watching one's spouse with someone else. Many men told me "My wife is the most beautiful woman in the world to me, I'd rather watch her having sex than some porn actress I don't know."

Not so much a part of the enticement for me. I have never had the opportunity to watch Mistress in action. What we have shared are her “post action” reports. Hot. Very Hot. 

Though we have talked about a situation where Slave was required to watch Mistress enjoy the attentions of another Man ….and I must say that has a certain appeal to both of us. I can relate to the guy who says that, if given the choice, I would much rather see a video of Mistress having sex than some overly pumped up porn actress.

• “Sperm competition - as Christopher Ryan, author Terry Gould, and researchers Baker and Bellis have suggested, there is a biological response playing out here, that affects a male sexual drive. After watching their wife with another man, the husband is prompted biologically to have longer, more vigorous sex, has a shorter refractory period between erections, ejaculates harder, and his ejaculate contains more sperm. Nearly every couple I interviewed told me that after an episode of the wife having sex with another man, the couple felt like they were "in heat."”

This seems to make sense….when Mistress has just concluded one of her cyber “dates” with M, or when she got home from one of her real dates with Sir M, we are / were crazy in lust for one another.


• “The Thrill of the Taboo - there are few things in our society as stigmatized as a husband whose wife is unfaithful. Historically, such men have been beaten, ostracized and ridiculed, and regarded as weak, "sissy men." Some of the men I interviewed described explicitly that the taboo was the thrill for them, from the excitement of the forbidden and the naughty.”

Not so much here. I don’t know that the beating part would be too appealing. And how can you call it “unfaithful” when she has permission?


• “Female empowerment - I was surprised by how many of these couples embraced very powerful feminist principles, and how many of these husbands described the joy they felt at their wife's increased independence, confidence and assertiveness, that came from the wife's freedom to have sex with other men. Many of the men expressed that through their wife's open sexuality, the couple was actively and consciously rejecting social pressures to suppress female sexuality, assert monogamy and patriarchal power.”

Yeaaah Baby! I like Mistress when she is flashing the power and confidence that comes with her remarkable beauty, smarts and street savvy. When she is being pursued by other men, and accepting or blowing off their attention, she is at her most powerful.


• “Bisexuality - In more than half of the men I interviewed, male bisexuality played a role in the husband's desires to watch his wife have sex with another man. This played out in many different dynamics. Sometimes, bringing a man to bed with the wife was a pretext, a bait and switch if you will, for the husband to then engage sexually with the man as well. Sometimes, the husbands were very concerned about being seen as heterosexual, but they spent an awful lot of time looking for well-endowed men for their wife. To my mind, a man who is that focused on the size of other men's penises really doesn't qualify as all that straight.”

No way for this Slave. No offense intended, but….pleasse….keep those cocks away from me.


• “Physical health issues - In Lady Chatterley's Lover, Lord Chatterley was physically unable to have intercourse with his wife (though, as my own wife points out, his fingers and tongue still worked just fine - why wasn't he using them?). I did see a number of men who reported that due to physical complaints, they weren't able to be as vigorous in bed as they and their wives would like. While the wives by and large were happy with things as they were, the husbands often felt their wife's loss of sexual satisfaction more strongly than the wife themselves, and were motivated to encourage the wife to sleep with other men.”

Thankfully, that’s not a problem in the Collins’ Household. Though I suppose it depends on what Mistress’s expectations are. 2-3 times a day is about my max. (Absent some of the days when the “sperm competition” factor mentioned above kicks in).



• “Female sexual fulfillment - women's sexual capacity is far greater than that of males'. The world record for male orgasms is about 26 in a 24-hour period. Per Sherfey's research, women have documented as many as 60-65 orgasms in a single hour. I saw many men who reported that their wives were highly sexual beings, with a greater sexual capacity, and it simply turned the husbands on and pleased them to be able to see their wives sexually satisfied, at a degree that a single husband couldn't match. I also speculate that there is a degree of vicarious experience here - by being a part of the experience, the husband gets to vicariously experience what it's like to have that greater sexual capacity, and identifies in a strong manner with his wife and the essence of female sexuality in a way that most men never experience.”

This makes sense to me. As I have written here before, Mistress has a wonderful sexual appetite. If it takes a village to keep her pleased, then I am happy to be just one of  the contented and attentive Villagers.


• “Masochism - Leopold von Sacher-Masoch was a 19th century fan of flagellation, who wrote Venus in Furs, about dominant women. Masochism was named after him. Leopold posted ads in German newspapers of the day, looking for "energetic young men" to befriend and pleasure his wife. (Check out Craigslist, and you'll see Leopold's modern counterparts) Leopold's interest in the experience was specifically the humiliation aspects, of being cuckolded, treated as weak, lesser, and not a real man. Like those who seek the Taboo, the cuckolds often seek out a strong SM flavor, where the husbands are dominated, belittled and degraded.”

Yeah, weird shit. But I gotta say…..this turns up the temperature for this humble Slave. Maybe after acting the uber competent professional for most of my adult life, a little humiliation is exactly what I deserve and need.


• “Financial reasons - Most of the women working in Nevada's brothels have husbands and boyfriends at home, who benefit from the wife's sexual exploits for pay. It's not always about the money. A friend, and a wife interviewed in my first book, told me that when she was working as a manager at a brothel, one of the women always called her husband on her cellphone, before bringing a man back to her room for a "party." Unbeknownst to the man, her husband was getting off listening in on the phone. The financial part is a piece that can't be ignored, as it has been around for a long time. In England, men would sometimes set up their wives to be seduces by a man, so that the husband could then sue the man in court. In Florida, in the 1990's, the Sheriff husband of the "Housewife Hooker" hid in the closet videotaping his "nymphomaniac wife" with other men (notably republican politicians), whom the husband then blackmailed.”

Nope….no checkbook motivation in the Collins’ home. Just plain old sex seems to be what gets me / us off. Not that Mistress wouldn’t make a very valued Courtesan.


• “The royalty perk - In the 1960's Motown song, the line goes "save the last dance for me," as the husband watches his wife dance with other men. Many of the men I interviewed got a thrill, a sense of being "king" that they had a wife who was so sexy, that other men wanted to be with, but who ultimately came home with him, the husband. It made the men feel powerful and successful, that they had such a sexy wife.”

This sounds like what that psychologist told me some months ago. And it still rings true. It’s nice to think that Mistress can sample all those other appealing cocks out there, and that they long for her, but that she still wants to come home to mine.

• “Misogyny - sadly, I saw some couples where the husband's encouragement of the wife to have sex with other men was about a degrading of the woman. Some of these men talked about treating the wife as a whore, as a piece of meat, and "taking her down a peg."”

Yuck. Mistress needs to be exalted, not degraded. This is not turn on for me.

Hope this article provides some food for thought. Can’t wait to hear how Mistress reacts to these various explanations for our “cuckold” kink.

And I look forward to hearing any alternative theories (or motivations ) that our other readers care to share.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

HNT/ The Return of Abstinence Day


Sin over at “Finding My Submission” asked some question in a comment yesterday about Abstinence Day.  Is it a tradition? Have we mentioned it before? Exactly what does it involve? And what does Mistress get out of it?

Well it’s a tradition in the Collins’ household in the same way that tweeting is: it goes back all the way to the long ago of the fall of 2009, right about the time Slave and Mistress signed their contract.

The notion was that Slave was spoiled: lots of sex, almost “on demand”. And while Mistress likes having sex on most every occasion (setting aside moments like Tuesday night after a long flight home, followed by an hour of stopped dead in Inter-state traffic past midnight, with surly teens grousing in the back, and us wondering how we will ever get up for work in the AM), she believed one good way to exercise control over her Slave was to show him that she (and only she) gets to decide when and if he can come.


The contract provides for “no touching” without her permission. I have come to accept that without difficulty. Though the thought of not being able to touch (even now as I type) does have a certain physical impact, even as I type this.

But, since we do have sex rather frequently, it’s rarely a difficult promise to keep.

The contract also says that I am not allowed to come while having sex without asking for and receiving  her permission. That’s something that is usually granted immediately upon request, though there are occasions when some begging is required.

Mistress does like to hear that desperation in my voice when I am very, very, very close and am struggling to restrain myself.

Abstinence Day was introduced early on in our Contractual relationship as a way to enhance that desperation. Originally the notion was that on Wednesday I would be expected to worship and otherwise serve Mistress with no expectation of my own reward until the following day.

This sometimes created unexpected problems though.

Example: I licked and sucked Mistress on a Wednesday evening, but was required to withdraw and go to sleep afterwards, deferring my own reward until Thursday.

We sleep in a double size bed. Close and cuddly.  But on those occasions, Slave would sometimes sleep fitfully. I would wake at 3 am or so with my cock as hard as rock, poking at Mistress and disturbing her beauty rest. Then, despite my devotion to her, I would find my fingers between her legs, waking her, and appealing to her more generous instincts to allow me access to her sumptuous cunt.

And I can’t ever recall being turned down under those circumstances.

While I suspect Mistress was not happy to lose that precious sleep, she is just too kind to push me out of bed and tell me to come back for her at a more respectable hour.

But it may be that these middle of the night interludes had gotten Mistress off of the Abstinence requirements these last few months.

Which brings me to yesterday.

We woke groggy from our late night of travel, our bodies still tuned to Mountain time. But work duty called.

I offered to worship Mistress after she showered, and she allowed it. I was on my knees, the taste of her clean shaven and nicely scrubbed parts were an excellent complement to my morning coffee. And while she patted my cock in gratification afterwards, I was still so sleepy that I had no problem with deferring my gratification.

Last night, after all of the catch-up at work, I came home to a yard out of control. So I spent some time mowing and weed whacking in  our dank, hot and dirty River City “Air”. After a shower to wash away the grime, I was given the opportunity to pleasure Mistress again, from my knees, as she lay across our bed.

Freshly cleaned and naked, my cock stood out at attention by the time I was done. Mistress was amused, but hardly moved to do anything about it.

“Hmmm….I think something wants me, Slave.”

“Oh, yes.”

“I I like that….one of my favorite benefits of Abstinence Day.”

After dinner and watching the DVR’ed “Christmas Party” episode of Mad Men (sadly, I am old enough to have been to a Christmas Party like that), We retired to bed.

Mistress had hinted that I might be rewarded for good behavior. So my hopes were up.

We both were naked, Mistress laying across the bed, working on her Vanilla Blog.

“Put in your device Slave. But I am going to make you wait at least until I finish this…”

Things were looking up. Hard to imagine that she would be so cruel as to make me use the little white probe and then tell me to wait until morning. Or would she?

“Yes, Mistress,” was all I said.

I slid into bed next to her, cock already beginning to grow from the influence of the probe.

My face rested against her lush and shapely ass. I had initially thought about reading through the Times as she revised and edited away, but somehow her bottom was too tempting.

So I proceeded to rest my head there, using lips and tongue to bathe it with affection.

She wiggled a bit, looking over her shoulder at me.

“Go gently Slave. Don’t distract me with any orgasms until I am done here.”

“Of course, Mistress.”

So close to a reward, I did not want to cross her.

So I respectfully attended to her bottom without overly stimulating her more sensitive parts.

All the while my cock is getting harder.

Finally she was done, folding away her laptop, pressing close to me, laughing at how hard my cock had become.

I used fingers to give her a starter cum as she wriggled against me.

Then, my cock as hard as ever, I asked for permission to slide inside.

“You may, Slave.  But I am still not sure that I will let you come tonight.  Let’s just see how it goes, and don’t ask for permission when it’s too late to stop if I decide to say ‘No’.”

I was happy to take any license granted.

Soon I was pistoning away at her , making sure to deliver the type of orgasm that would put Mistress in an indulgent mood.

After she seemed satisfied, but was still sighing and wriggling beneath me, I was closing in on the point of no return.

“Mistress, can I come?”

“Not just yet, Slave….I’m still considering….”

Argh. Pacing. Close. Back off. Close again.

I was at the point where I would have to go forward or retreat altogether.

I made one last request.

“Pretty Please, Mistress…..”

“Yes….you may  come now, Slave.”


Ahhhh.

And my clever Mistress got a very good and undisturbed night’s sleep.